Bert, Ernie, Don’t You Recognize Me???

I guess I’m a little late on this one and never heard about the posters that a bunch of “freedom fighters” around the world were holding up at rallies in support of Obama Osama Bin Laden.  Anyway, here’s a shot of it…

Bert Is Evil

If you haven’t seen this yet then you might not notice Bert of Sesame Street fame, glaring over Bin Laden’s left shoulder.  My first guess was that this was the handy-work of a Photoshop clown with no job, but it’s not.  I do not want to get into a ten page dissertation about world histories long line of tyrants and their Cult of Personality followers.  I do want to talk about these same followers inability to simply proof a G.D. document such as this before handing out 2,000 of them at a pep rally for their child molesting leader B-Laden (that’s his stage name). 

Come on douche bags; no wonder your pyramid scheme also known as the religion of islam isn’t gaining much new real estate besides that of third world countries in western Africa.  I know, I know, the Kinkos down the street from Bin Laden’s cave is a real shit hole and doesn’t even offer hard copy proofing.  Excuses!  Do you think Killface would take this kind of marketing 101 incompotence laying down?  Don’t worry Binny, the DoD offers a great set of apps online for all your document printing needs.  Just register, login, upload your document, create a job, and (tah duh!) you’re done.  Just be sure to include a current address for prompt (laser guided) delivery.   

It does appear that these terrorist scumbag inbreed pieces of camel dung are now using cute little cartoons to win over new little converts, such as this example, where Hamas is using Mickey Mouse to teach the kiddies their terrorist ways.  I’m all for using cartoons to teach kids the importance of religion, such as the VeggieTales, but the key word is to teach religion, not how to kill members of other religions (e.g., Jews, Christians).  So, the official rule is you can use cartoons to teach religion to children, but not if it’s a fake made up one from the 6th century.

This also made me think.  What if there is an Allah?  What if he is a super-being?  It would make perfect sense.  Maybe he’s running the island on Lost?  I think they may even speak of him in the bible.  Let’s see if we can find him in there…

bertisevil2.jpg

Wait, that’s not him.  But really; maybe Allah is the antithesis of God.  We need a cool name for this opposite of Christ?  I got it, the antijesus.  No wait, that sounds stupid.  The antih?  I give up.  I just can’t think of one good thing to call this antichrist if you will.  Oh well.  

Maybe he’s the devil himself?  That would make perfect sense.  Christianity and islam have been duking it out for centuries now and the only good thing that’s come out of it is maybe Italians.  Oh, that and hummus.  So, God sends Christ to form Christianity, teaching of peace, and love, and respect for others.  Then 600 years later Satan sends Muhammad to form islam; you know, the opposite of all that stuff.  Remember, Christ did not have a nine year-old wife, he did not teach that non-believers are to be enslaved, and he did not say to kill all those who do not believe through jihad.  That my friends was Mo (look it up people).  Did I just type that?  I am such an insensitive ass sometimes.  I just hope the “religion of peace” doesn’t see this and decide to pay me a visit in the middle of the night to talk about the “love of Muhammad.”  Peace be with you.    

The point is – you can blow up our building, kill thousands of our citizens on our own soil, chop off the heads of non-believers (peace be with you), fight to stop the spread of freedom, and attempt to destroy western civilization.  But you’ve crossed the line when you mess with our Disney cartoon characters.  We don’t screw with your beloved characters such as Carl the Camel, or Chris the Camel, or Doug the Double-humped Camel.  Sammy the Sand Dune?  Off limits.  Ali the Oil Well?  Him too.  Those are treasured characters that are admired by children around the middle-east and should in no way be disparaged.  So, let’s sign a quick little peace treaty.  You stay away from Mickey and Bert, and we’ll stay away from this guy…   

mickeyindjibouti.jpg

Fig 1: The World Famous Muhammad Mouse in Djibouti (pronounced Ja Booty yo).     

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Posted on May 8, 2007, in Humor, Politics, Punditry. Bookmark the permalink. 2 Comments.

  1. The Wearer of the Pants

    I realize that I’m in trouble for even fact checking, however….

    http://www.snopes.com/rumors/bert.htm

    So the picture is real, but created by a San Francisco artist. Yes, you read that right! Don’t know which would have been worse; the terrorists or one of us!! Not that I mean any of these great readers can possibly compared to a San Francisco artist, but you get my point.

  2. The Wearer of the Pants

    Wow – The Third Wheel is slacking!

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