Larry Bird Johnson Dies?

Look at my Magic Johnson as I make it disappear!

Was I the only complete idiot that glanced over the “Lady Bird Johnson Dies” headline and thought for a fleeting moment that Larry Bird and Magic Johnson had died yesterday?  Man, that was a close one.  How cool would that be though?  One of the two greatest rivals in basketball history die on the same day, a la Thomas Jefferson and John Adams dying within hours of each other on the 4th of July exactly 50 years to the day after they “gave birth” to this great country.  Okay, a Bird/Johnson death would not quite be as big of a headline as a Jefferson/Adams death (outside of Boston), but a distant second I’m sure. 

At any rate, I was shocked to find out she had died mostly because it was news to me that she was still alive in the first place.  Rest in peace Larry… err, I mean Lady Bird Johnson.  You were a good woman.  Oh, and good luck finding LBJ or JFK up there.     

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Posted on July 12, 2007, in Humor, Sports, Stupidipity. Bookmark the permalink. 8 Comments.

  1. The Wearer of the Pants

    I was scared…

  2. I would have only grieved for one soul, Mr Magic Johnson. His ability and skeet prowess are second to only two men (Michael Jordan and Wilt Chamberlain respectively). As for Bird, I will never forgive his theft of Isiah’s inbounds pass in the Conference Finals …rot in hell you bastard!

    P.S. – French Lick Deeeeeeeezzz!

  3. Q-the-Impaler

    Was I the only complete idiot that glanced over the “Lady Bird Johnson Dies” headline…?

    I was in the same boat.

  4. dMac,

    Do not forsake The Bird, for the wrath of all us Massholes shall descend upon thee like the Irish to whiskey!

    Speaking of offending people, what’s up with Magic still being alive after “contracting” AIDS like 25 years ago? There are one of two reasons for this: Truly magic (black magic that is) or the federal government gave him some of the super secret antidote they created decades ago. Of course they created an antidote. It’s not that hard when you were the ones who created the virus in the first place. Did y’all hear that? Sounded like a black helicopter. They’ve found me!!!!!

  5. The 3rd Wheel...on a Tricycle

    C’mon HDW…Magic is HIV positive, he never had AIDS.

    Our government would NEVER do anything as sinister as you have suggested….

  6. So, what you’re saying is you’d have sex (protected or otherwise) with someone who is just HIV positive?

    Also, we all know the federal government created AIDS in a lab, orchestrated 9/11, and faked the moon landing. Next thing you know you’re going to tell me you don’t believe in Global Warming????

    Where do you nuts come from?

  7. The 3rd Wheel...on a Tricycle

    Listen…I didnt say “just” HIV positive…how did this turn into a sex question?? I was simply offering an explaination as to why he is still alive!

    Dont forget the Holocaust that never happened…

  8. I didn’t even know they were married.

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