Hatriots Fan (R-PA)

For the past couple of weeks we’ve all had the displeasure of listening to all the sports talk commentary concerning today’s Super Bowl game.  We’ve been getting the usual comments from the usual talking heads that range from the strange — “The Giants can win,” to the absurd — “The Giants will win and blow out the Patriots.”  Of course, either of the two teams can win this game, and I’m not going to even attempt to speculate its outcome. 

Yes, I know speculative statements are to be expected from the media.  That’s all they know how to do.  No real mathematical or analytical analysis, just bullshit and more bullshit in between all the garbage someone is trying to sell you during the commercial breaks.  After all, the media’s job is to sell the game as if it’s going to be a close and exciting event, hoping to entice you to watch, even if they expect a blowout.  Nothing wrong with that, but it does get old fast.  Sportscasters even do it during the game, and in every sport.  How many of us have been watching a baseball game in the bottom of the ninth, home team is up by four, two on, two outs, and the announcer gleefully proclaims, “the tying run is on-deck.”  Really?  Shut the f**k up asshole!!!!     

Worse even, not just sports commentators submit their worthless two cents worth when it’s one of the big games just around the corner.  But, after a few weeks of listening to non-professional commentators give us their football opinion, it’s really starts to get tough to turn on the TV, radio, or even read the church bulletin.  No, Jesus doesn’t care who wins reverend, so stick with the immaculate conception, not the immaculate reception.  For those of you in Gainesville reading that line and thinking, “Ohhhh, immaculate conception… that’s where it came from,” you’re welcome.    

Well, now the opinions on this game and football in general are getting out of control.  Listen here, if you’re a U.S. Senator and you haven’t yet figured out how to make my Social Security solvent by 2030 or solved the illegal immigration problem, please shut your f**king fat mouth and sit down.  You know who you are Senator, you old worthless piece of politician.  By the way Senator, if you didn’t know, the National Football League is a private corporation.  Also, you are a lawmaker.  You are in the legislative branch of government, not the executive, and thank God, not the judicial.  SHUT UP!!! 

Your job is to take vacations and figure out new inefficient ways to take our hard earned money and redistribute it to the idiots, not to harass private corporations that are not breaking the law.  You do it oh so well, so stick with what you know… and that’s not football.  So, until a corporation breaks the ridiculous laws and regulations you sit in your glass house and create, you just keep filling your bank account and those adult diapers and keep your laws off this countries past time.  Besides, we all know this isn’t about you being concerned with the sanctity of the game but rather you just trying to protect your precious Steelers record of five Super Bowl wins and Bradshaw’s four Super Bowl rings.  Sad and pathetic, you Hatriot fan.  Just like every other Senator I suppose. 

Okay, just kidding about not speculating… Patriots 48 – Giants 14 – Arlen Spector 0.