About HolyDogWater

You may be wondering what the hell HolyDogWater is all about (join the club my friend, I’m in charge and I have no f**king idea).  Or maybe you have a life, a career, and a family and could give a rat’s ass.  This site is currently full of a lot of misspelled words, poorly formed sentences with no coherent thought pattern, broken links, and more JavaScript errors than a web page coded by Stevie Wonder after a long night of binge drinking.  

The functioning pages are chock full of content only my dog really cares about. She is the Editor-in-Chief and what she says goes.  Yes, my dog talks to me; but don’t worry, I’m not crazy.  It’s only when I’m really drunk, have popped a few of those little yellow round pills, and I’m fighting off sleep trying to watch Adult Swim’s 487th airing of The Family Guy episode where Peter gets into trouble and fights a giant chicken.  Wait, Peter’s dog Brian talks to him too, right?  This explains a lot.  Maybe it’s Peter’s dog who has been talking to me all this time???  Nah!!!!   

Anyway, don’t ask about the origin of the name Holy Dog Water, only four people know and one of them is dead.  No, it wasn’t one of those “If I tell you I’ll have to kill” type deaths.  It was more like one of those, “Dude, you didn’t even graduate high school and you’re building one of those ultra-light experimental aircraft’s?” type deaths.  You know, the rocket scientist’s antithesis.

What I would eventually like on the site is a bunch of stuff only people I care about, cares about. You know, sports (e.g., BoSox, Pats, Jags, ‘Noles), drinking, humor, politics, porn, movie reviews, the unifying hatred of the TV show Lost and its creator J.J. Abrams, music, fine poetry (and by fine poetry I mean more porn).   Just kidding, my dog will not allow porn on this site.  She thinks, and I quote, “it degrades the bitches.”  Don’t tell anyone, but I think she’s a feminist.  I know what you’re thinking, “HDW, how can your dog be a feminist, she’s beautiful?” I know, it makes no sense to me either.

So, as I add more content and extend your ability to add your own content I would love for a little input if you feel so inclined.  If not, well, your loss.  Just go back to that boring CNN or Wall Street Journal website then.  Who needs you anyway?  I know you’re busy, what with all those women you’re not going to pick up and bang, and money not to make, and starving third world children not to feed.  

But before you go don’t forget to donate to the ‘HolyDogWater Xbox 360 Fund’. Remember, it’s for the children.

  1. I am sooooooo looking forward to your new blogggging duuuude!!!!
    Love ya T

  2. Grace Thompson

    Hey there funny guy… sorry to bother you with this but I was doing a search for my old buddy Scott and the only thing that came up was his name tagged on your photos. I’d love for you to pass my email address onto Scott Meyerholtz if you would be so kind. We grew up together… I spent all summer swimming in his pool freshman year… anyway hope this isn’t too much trouble.

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