Category Archives: Nation of Islamofascists

Hearts and Minds and Bears, Oh My!

For about five years now—since the liberation of Iraq—we’ve been hearing a lot about the importance of winning the “hearts and minds” of a nation’s citizenry in order to “secure the peace” after a war is fought and won.  During this time we’ve all read articles, watched newscasts, listened to pundits, and talked to our friends — pontificating whether the West was “winning” or “losing” in Iraq.  The hardest variable to figure out in a tough equation such as this, as in any complex problem, is quantifying what to measure and how to measure it.  What represents a win, a loss, or more so, what represents whether you’re currently heading towards a win or a loss. 

Not that anyone wants to put something so serious as war in the form of a lame and possibly disrespectful analogy, but everyone wants to know when we as team supporters should give up and leave the stadium to beat traffic.  Personally, I’ve always been part of the 1/3 that stay in the stadium regardless of whether my team is ahead, behind, or getting hammered by the opposition with no chance of even a miracle comeback.  With that said, I’ve never thought for a second that the U.S. military was even down, let alone in a position of possibly losing in Iraq.  Now, you may think I’m an idiot for consistently holding this position where we couldn’t lose in Iraq, but that’s probably because you consume all your thoughts through the filter of the media and then recite, no, regurgitate them as your own, instead of creating thoughts through research, logic, and reason.  In sports colloquialism, you’re quite simply a worthless bandwagon fan.

In the current situation, the only possible chance the “away team” could have lost in Iraq was during the 2004 and 2006 midterm elections.  The only way to lose then was through a precipitous pullout before the people of Iraq even had a chance to get their ducks in a row, leaving the country to the whims of criminals, and eventually another dictator.  Equating what the people of Iraq have to do to get their country in order as “getting their ducks in a row” is quite possibly the biggest understatement since… well, I’ve got nothing, it’s probably the biggest understatement ever.  If you need a nice reference point as to what the Iraqi’s are up against politically, do a little research on how hard it was for the city of Boston to dig a big tunnel under their city; and no one was shooting at the workers or trying to blow up the tunnel during that project either.   

Can anyone give me an example of an existing government being completely dismantled and another being formed in the span of five years without massive military involvement and civil unrest?  You hear from some pundits on the left about how it took less time to get Germany and Japan in order after World War II.  The parallels aren’t even close to similar, not to mention we’re still “occupying” those countries today.  To this day, we provide Japan with most of their national defense, while Germany needed our military presence for fifty years after World War II to keep the Russians at bay to the west. 

Japan and Germany’s perceived lack of an insurgency following the war—even though most aren’t aware that there was one in both countries (see: German Werewolf Insurgency)—may have had something to do with the level of destruction to those countries, with the enemy and all infrastructure being completely and utterly destroyed.  The enemy was not just disbanded and sent home in Germany, it was killed in the millions.  After the war, some European countries were without a significant young male population all together.  Japan had not one, but two atomic bombs dropped on two separate major industrial cities.  The hearts and minds of the enemy didn’t have to be won, because they were destroyed.  Bother countries geographical location, with one being an island and the other being surrounded by allied friendly countries, may have also contributed to such a small post war insurgency. 

Can you name the places the United States liberated and are still “occupying” that isn’t a free and prosperous nation today?  Germany, Japan, South Korea, France, Poland?  Better or worse?  Would the people of Kuwait be better or worse off right now?  What if Kennedy decided to hold his end of the bargain and help the people of Cuba during the Bay of Pigs, or better yet, not involve us in Vietnam without a plan for winning the peace?  Two million Cambodians would love to know, but unfortunately, they’re dead.  Millions of North Koreans, living in the stone age, would love to have the misfortune of being “invaded” like Iraq.  It’s like winning the lottery for most countries, but only when the military is allowed to do their good works and finish the damn job.  

Flash forward to Iraq, 2003.  In this current iteration of war we have seen the unprecedented execution of a plan designed to minimize civilian as well as even military casualty.  This has more to do with explaining the power of the insurgency as anything else.  Yes, destroying the infrastructure would have meant more rebuilding, but by leaving in place the vast number of enemy soldiers and commanders that were intentional embedded into the general population, the stage was set for a first in military history.  Not only was the military leadership scattered amongst the general population, along with vast amounts of cash to finance operations, but the infrastructure necessary to wage an insurgency was also left at their disposal.  The alternative was to bomb and kill millions of innocent civilians indiscriminately to ensure a weak insurgency power structure that was hidden within.  With unfriendly 24-hour news networks and embedded reporters at every turn, this was not a viable option as it was in previous wars.  Couple this with foreign interference after the fact, which included money, equipment, and even fighters; it’s actually quite amazing how well coalition troops have done.

Lucky for us all (and by all I mean the entire world), the 2004 election brought us leadership that understood the need, and most of all, the benefit of finishing what we started.  With the insurgency growing and supposed bad news mounting, the fickle 1/3 of the population (the ones between the other 2/3 standing to their left and their right) jumped ship.  Fortunately for us all, the weak minded did not prevail.  The 1/3 that held steadfast in their position through thick and thin has not only fought off the 1/3 on the left, but also the 1/3 in the middle who couldn’t hold true to a position if you nail gunned their asses to it.  A victory in Iraq will be remembered for two reasons, and two reasons only — The United States Armed Forces, and President George Walker Bush. 

Whether you’re a liberal and you dislike him because he’s too conservative, or you’re a conservative and you dislike him because he’s too liberal, one thing can be said for certain — The man led this country during war with conviction and honor, and I personally thank him.  History will vindicate him, just as it has President Ronald Wilson Reagan, God rest his soul.  Most in President Bush’s position would have buckled to the will of the democrat lead congress, or the polls that include those bandwagon 1/3 in the middle who couldn’t decide how they wanted their eggs cooked without being brought to tears.  If you need help, it’s quite easy to identify the fickle 1/3 in the middle — they’re wearing a brand new New York Giants hat, or a crisp shiny new Boston Red Sox jacket.  They should really just focus on what really matters in their lives… American Idol.

So, back to the task at hand — how do we quantify a victory?  How do we determine if we’re at least moving in the right direction?  Well, if you’re against the war you’ll probably point to the fact that civilians are dying and immediately come to the conclusion that we should get out.  This of course is disingenuous since even they know the bloodshed in Iraq would increase 100 fold without the brave men and women of the U.S. military protecting the innocent.  The “intellectuals” on the left in Hollywood preach to us all the time about the ills of America and how it’s killing the innocent in Iraq.  Sharon Stone was recently quoted as saying the military liberation of Iraq was somehow responsible for the deaths of 600,000 innocent civilian Iraqis and that the lives of Iraqis are ignored while the lives of the (only?) 4,000 brave men and women who died trying to protect these civilians are somehow too heralded and celebrated for their sacrifice.  Here’s her quote.

“I feel at great pain when the spotlight is on the death of 4,000 American soldiers, while 600,000 Iraqi deaths are ignored,”

Hey Sharon, I’ll make a deal with you.  I promise to leave the “showing off the beaver on the silver screen” to those who have a beaver, if you promise to leave the thinking to those of us who have a brain.  NEWS FLASH: We spotlight the lives of those 4,000 soldiers because they’re over there dying trying to protect the innocent who are being killed by terrorists.  They’re the ones trying to stop children from being slaughtered at the hands of radical Islam.  They’re also Americans, and you should fall to your knees with pain in your heart knowing another American is suffering in anyway, even for such a noble cause as this.

Not withstanding this bimbo’s credentials, let’s just pretend to believe her outrageous number of 600,000 Iraqi civilians killed.  Let’s just pretend that 120,000 civilians a year have been murdered in Iraq since its liberation in 2003.  Let’s imagine that 10,000 a month have died every month since then.  That 2,500 men, women, and children, are dying each week.  A total of 322 humans a day, 13 every hour, 1 every 4.6 minutes of every day for five years straight.  600,000 souls!  From sun up to sundown and throughout the night as people slept; 13 lives every hour have supposedly been ended, for almost five years straight.

Now that we’re done with the sicko math, I ask her, even if the number is plausible (which it’s not), how many of these people died at the hands of U.S. servicemen?  Even if you believe this outrageously exaggerated and politically expedient number of 600,000, do you believe the U.S. soldier did most of them?  Even half of them?  Maybe 95% of them she would tell you?  Actually, I’m sure that almost none were intentional killed by soldiers, especially when you factor out the “civilians” killed that are not at all civilians, but rather terrorists and insurgents, classified by these “peace” organizations as the innocent. 

I’ll take your sicko math another step further.  How many innocent lives in Iraq are saved each day by the brave men and women of the armed forces?  How many were murdered each year at the hands of a dictatorial regime before the military showed up five years ago?  The same human rights organizations that calculate 600,000 dead today, estimated that over one million died the previous 20 years under Saddam Hussein.  Was that number going to get better or worse under a Saddam dictatorial regime?    Do you think it’s a net gain or net loss of life today?  Is it a net gain or loss when compared to what would happen without our help today?  People have got to stop consuming the news as if it were the gospel according to Katie Couric.  Think just for a moment about what could have happened had certain events not occurred.  Don’t be just one dimensionally about what is happening, but rather, also what could have happened.  Historical perspective.  Cause and effect.  Logical fallacies. 

Enough about the bimbo life-wing mathematician.  We’re still left with the unsavory task of deciding how to quantify whether or not we are indeed winning in Iraq.  We know that the loss of life has dropped markedly over the past year, for the soldier as well as the civilian.  This should be welcome and joyous news for all on the right as well as the left of the political spectrum.  All Americans and all humans should be rejoicing, right?  But alas, this is not the case.  Some hope for a continued body count to ensure their sick political ambitions.  It’s beyond the pale and treasonous at best.  Politicizing an issue as serious as this is the second oldest profession known to man, and the whores know who they are. 

Quantifying the win is something I may have finally figured out how to calculate; and without using the liberal “too many lives lost,” or “too much of my money spent” benchmarks for withdrawal.  Our goal in Iraq, when we leave (for the most part), is to ensure the people of that country have a chance at life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.  That’s it.  A chance at success.  The distinct possibility that once left to their own devices they can continue to make life better for all their citizens as well as neighbors.  Like kicking your kid out of the house at the age of 18, not the age of 5, the chances of success increases with time.  Can they screw it up still?  Of course they can.  Look at how we’re trying to screw up our republic over 200 years after its creation.  Yes, leaving Iraq right now and just hoping the power of music creates peace is noble and even has a very slim chance of success (and by slim, I mean .00000000003), but without at least a certain guarantee, I’m sticking with what we’ve invested in and what has worked in the past — the U.S. military. 

Okay, so again, how do we know when we’re winning in Iraq?  Should we stay for the entire event, or try and beat the traffic home?  Read this article and form you own conclusion.  No, don’t get someone’s opinion about the article; read it and decide for yourself.  Are we winning?  And no, this is not an article from The Weekly Standard, it’s from the New York Freaking Times.  Now, if the New York Times can publish something like this, I would have to say so.  But don’t take my word for it, let’s ask an Iraqi…  

“I used to love Osama bin Laden,” proclaimed a 24-year-old Iraqi college student. She was referring to how she felt before the war took hold in her native Baghdad. The Sept. 11, 2001, strike at American supremacy was satisfying, and the deaths abstract.

Now, the student recites the familiar complaints: Her college has segregated the security checks; guards told her to stop wearing a revealing skirt; she covers her head for safety.

“Now I hate Islam,” she said, sitting in her family’s unadorned living room in central Baghdad. “ Al Qaeda and the Mahdi Army are spreading hatred. People are being killed for nothing.”

She hates Islam, or at least its teachings of hate?  One persons quote is all the quantifying I need.  She hates Islam, folks.  Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!!!!!

Countries Better Than America Watch: Saudi Arabia — Star (bucks Holy) Wars

Once again, another fine example of why liberals hate America and love the rest of the world.  Here’s the story of a young American woman living in Saudi Arabia.  She enjoys working there and the highlight of her week is when she gets to enjoy a nice hot cup of coffee with a coworker at the local Starbucks.  That is, until the religious police show up and accuse you of fraternizing with a male not related to you. 

Her other sins against Allah?  She was dressed rather provocatively.  Translation: Showing too much neck and face, making otherwise peaceful and law abiding Saudi men want to rape her.  And what prattle do you think the religious po po do when they arrest a woman for such heinous acts as dressing “slutty” at a coffee shop?  Why, they strip-search her of course.

The men were from Saudi Arabia’s Commission for Promotion of Virtue and Prevention of Vice, a police force of several thousand men charged with enforcing dress codes, sex segregation and the observance of prayers.

Yara says she was interrogated, strip-searched and forced to sign and fingerprint a series of confessions pleading guilty to her “crime,” the Times reported.

I know what you’re wondering, if she’s charged with the crime of fraternizing with a male companion that’s not a relative and also for looking too hot, then where the hell did the “re po po” find a family member of hers on such short notice to strip-search her?  She better just thank God Allah she didn’t fail to give a man an erection, or she’d be put to death.  You stay classy Saudi Arabia… you stay classy.

The Salaam Witch Hunt

Every four years, without fail, some people will reveal to all their friends, family, and anyone else in earshot at the bar, that if <insert political candidate> wins the election, they’re moving to another country.  If they’re conservative, it’s off to Australia, if they’re liberal, it’s off to Cuba, where it’s fair because everyone gets the same sized government issued rice cooker.  Albeit, no rice to cook, but at least your neighbor’s family is starving too.  Finally, equality for all my friend.

One of the other countries the younger liberals love to love is Iran, where its leader pulls no punches when addressing the evils of the tyrannical President Bush and the Great Satan, America.  Any country that hates America can’t be all that bad, right hippies?  They truly do believe in and embrace the old Art of War philosophy that “The enemy of my enemy is my friend” (okay, maybe that’s not from the Art of War, but it sounds better when I reference it as such). 

So, to counter the love-fest these Clintonites show for these insidious theocracies, we here at HDW like to post examples outlining the ills of these ass backwards middle eastern countries, and boy have we found a dozy this time.  Today’s example takes us to beautiful sunny Saudi Arabia, which is actually one of the few countries the liberals do hate, but only because they have the audacity to allow the U.S. to maintain a military presence there, which is ideal for launching attacks on the once tranquil peace loving nations of Iraq and Afghanistan. 

Our story is that of a witch and her crimes against Islam.  Here’s the nut of the story.

The illiterate woman was detained by religious police in 2005 and allegedly beaten and forced to fingerprint a confession that she could not read.

Among her accusers was a man who alleged she made him impotent.

Human Rights Watch said that Ms Falih had exhausted all her chances of appealing against her death sentence and she could only now be saved if King Abdullah intervened.   

That’s right, this illiterate woman has been convicted of witchcraft and sentenced to death on the grounds that she made a guy impotent through the wonders of magic.  Really?  She used magic?  Women usually just make men impotent through the power of getting really fat, so this is a little bit of overkill if you ask me.  Although, knowing some of the laws in the middle east, a woman getting really fat is probably a crime punishable by death as well. 

But, let’s just play along and assume that she did cast a magic spell called “abbry cadabry, your dong’s always flabby”.  Is that really a crime punishable by death?  If so, Saudi Arabia needs to immediately go pick up Rosie O’Donnell.  She’s made more men impotent than eating a salt-peter popsicle while accidentally seeing your grandma naked as she’s getting out of the tub.  “Now, put down that popsicle and hand gammy her robe.” 

All kidding aside, how can any woman or liberal not want to destroy some of these countries current governments and religious institutions?  If anything else, let’s at least do it for the sake of half their population; the half that had the misfortune and dumb luck of being born female in the middle east. 

Now, where did I put my wand?  That lock of Hillary Clinton’s hair that I bought on eBay just arrived in the mail and I have to get started before this falls erection, err… I mean election.  Damn it, if she wins, I’m moving to Austria!!!  Or is it Australia?  Whatever!    

Mommy, Where Do Terrorists Come From?

There’s the $100,000 question your children want to ask you… where do terrorists come from mommy?  Well, if you ask a liberal—God only knows why you’d ask those brain dead intellectually bankrupt socialists—the woman would probably tell you it’s because of economic suppression by the ruling class on the working class, or maybe because America allows women to co-exist without fear of beatings or even death.  Well, much data and many studies are out there supporting the opposite to be true with regard to whether economic hardship creates terrorists, and it actually appears that the “ruling class and rich” are more so the norm.  The rich and well educated (there are quite a few doctor terrorists) appear to participate in the act of terrorism more so than their poorer counterparts. 

I can tell you one thing that breeds terrorism that is almost completely without exception, and that’s simply the scientific fact that these losers can’t get laid.  We’ve talked about it here before on HDW and have showcased some of the more attractive one-eyed one-armed bandits.  Case in point: Look at the kids in public government run socialist schools around the country and you’ll soon see a strong direct correlation.  How many boys getting massive amounts of action in schools are sneaking in guns and killing their classmates en mass?  Right, almost none.  They’re too busy getting laid and being super happy.  I’ll give you a few minutes to google “school shootings” and will wait here until you get back with your research results…  okay, done?  Good!  Just what I thought.  So, we’ve come to the conclusion that making sweet love to a woman will ensure “happiness” in a man’s life (and some ladies lives) to the extent he doesn’t want to kill his fellow man, at least not in bulk.  After twenty years of marriage, he may soon want to kill her for getting on his last good nerve, but at least he’s not killing every co-worker in gun-sight or flying planes into buildings.

Don’t believe terrorists are almost always beyond getting laid?  I would like to submit into evidence exhibit A…

Terrorist Studs!

Look mom, it’s the Back Alley Boys!  Or is it NSTYNC?  Like I said, these guys couldn’t get laid in a camel whore house with a bag of dates and jars of fresh hummus.  By the way, the dude in the middle with the scars on his face was not roughed up by the CIA in a black-ops prison in Eastern Europe as you might think.  He was actually required to take a beating in the face  every morning with a razor strap (200 lashes) for his lack of beard growing ability.  Hey, it’s in the “muslim bible”, look it up.  Wait, on second thought, according to islamic law you can be executed for touching the koran (being a vile and dirty half monkey infidel), so scratch that.  Don’t worry beardless dude, what you lack in beard growing ability you well make up for in Eddie Vedder hair-do ability.  Move to Seattle after you get out of prison in 40 years and you’ll be stirring your Starbucks coffee with a vagina. 

So, where in the hell am I going with this you might ask.  Actually, I’m glad you finally did ask.  What took you so long?  Check out this article about a 19-year-old woman in Saudi Arabia who was beaten near to death (200 lashes) and sentenced to six months in prison… for being gang raped!  No, I didn’t type that wrong, she wasn’t beaten by the many men that raped her, but rather sentenced and carried out by the judicial system who found her guilty of being in the presence of another man she was not related to.  She was in the car with him when two men car jacked them and drove them to a remote location where seven other men gang raped her. 

You see, in the Islamic Republic of Saudi Arabia, women can’t even be around another man not related to her.  Maybe this explains the high level of gang rapes?  Or maybe the even higher level of incest and molestation in smaller towns throughout the middle east.  Women aren’t allowed to drive either, so maybe that’s why she had to have a male companion driving her around in the first place assholes!  I know what you’re thinking, if the ladies aren’t allowed to drive there, at least some good comes from these theocracies, right?  I kid, I kid.

So, what’s the moral of the story?  Remember ladies, you don’t know how good you’ve got it in this country until you’ve been raped and not sent to jail and not beaten 200 times across the back for it.  Look on the bright side, at least after being raped you’re not going to prison and getting raped more like in Saudi Arabia.  Am I right?

The Beatings Will Continue Until Morale Improves

You guys are not going to believe this.  Some Muslim cleric has proclaimed that beating your wife is not something you should do… without first admonishing them and refusing to share a bed with them.  So, correct them ten times, kick them out of bed, then and only then, is it okay to slap the shit out of them.  Sign me up!!!!  If only I could grow a decent beard.  So ladies, remember, a vote for Hillary is a vote for wife beating.  Here is some other marriage advice he gave.

“Beating in the face is forbidden, even when it comes to animals,” he explained. “Even if you want your camel or donkey to start walking, you are not allowed to beat it in the face. If this is true for animals, it is all the more true when it comes to humans. So beatings should be light and not in the face.”

Dude, any wife beater worth his salt already knows to beat their wives in a way that her co-workers, friends, and especially family can’t see the bruises.  What is this guy, a rookie?  I do love his rationale that you wouldn’t hit your camel or donkey in the face to get them to walk, so why would you do that to your wife.  That’s right, slap her on the ass instead!  Wait, it gets even better.

“Woman, it has gone too far. I can’t bear it anymore,” he tells the men to tell their wives. “If he beats her, the beatings must be light and must not make her face ugly.

I know what you’re thinking, and I would have asked the same question.  What if she’s already ugly?  Can I punch her in the throat then?  How about a good kick to the nose?  If only someone would hurry up and invent steal-toed sandals already.  Come on Mr. Religious and Spiritual leader, she’s already ugly.  I mean Jesus… err, I mean Allah, I’d already rather have sex with my camel or goat anyway.  Of course, I’ve saved the best for last.

“He should not beat her like he would beat an animal or a child — slapping them right and left.”

Really?  Dude, I was all about converting to Islam, but you lost me at not being able to beat my wife the same way I beat my child.  After a hard days work at the sand factory, I should be able to come home and take it out on the ones I love by doing the following (and in this order): 

  1. Kicking my dog in the stomach.
  2. Punching my child in the face.
  3. And finally, beating my wife just as hard as I beat my dog and child.

What kind of mickey mouse crazy ass religion are y’all running over there?  Did you really think all of this through when you made up this religion?  What if I’m married to my daughter?  You see there, now that’s thinking outside of the proverbial box, theologically speaking.  Here are some departing words from al Don Juan Abdul Obama: marriage counselor to the sheiks.

“Unfortunately, many husbands beat their wives only when they get mad, and when they start beating, it as if they are punching a wall – they beat with their hands, right and left, and sometimes use their feet. Brother, it is a human being you are beating. This is forbidden. He must not do this.”   

Yes, ye must always remember while beating a wife, she too is a human being.  Well, three fifths of a human being anyway, but close enough, right?  Am I right?  It’s not like she’s allowed to drive.  So Islam, until you get these wife beating rules a little more clearly defined, I’ll just stick with being good ole Irish Catholic, where both the husband and wife get to beat the shit out of the kids and each other, thank you very much!